


I'm With You.

by respoftw



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Fix It Fic, Fluff, M/M, Post Real SHIELD reveal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-17
Updated: 2015-04-17
Packaged: 2018-03-23 10:31:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3764842
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/respoftw/pseuds/respoftw
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A quick fix it fic that I wrote post episode 2x15  Originally posted on <a href="http://fitzheartmack.tumblr.com">tumblr</a></p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm With You.

Mack couldn’t find the words to start.

He shifted on the hospital bed, trying to find a comfortable position amongst all the cuts and bruises.  He saw the way Fitz’s eyes briefly creased in concern at the reminder of his injuries and fervently hoped that this was a sign that he could be absolved.

Fitz was standing in front of him, arms crossed, with a defiant look on his face.  Mack was happy to see that look, anything would be better than the heartbroken and terrified look that Fitz had been wearing the last time they spoke.  Mack never wanted to see that look on Fitz’s face again.  The fact that he put it there in the first place was killing him.  

He knew he owed Fitz an explanation and that Fitz was waiting but Mack couldn’t stop staring and start talking.  The utter panic he had felt when he realised the wall was about to blow was still too close.  He had been convinced that he wouldn’t make it in time to shield Fitz.  That he would have caused another person he loved to die.  _Actually, that seemed a good enough place to start._

“When SHIELD fell, I saw a lot of people get killed.  HYDRA agents, colleagues, friends and….and someone that I loved.”

Mack paused, taking a deep breath, gathering the courage to talk about Tim.  Fitz remained silent, still willing to listen which was all Mack could ask.

“Tim was so fucking smart, Turbo.  He could have given you a run for your money.” Mack smiled at the thought of Fitz and Tim meeting.  They would have liked each other.

“HYDRA may have killed him but it was my fault.  I tried to save him, to take his place and I just drew attention to him.  They shot him right in front of me.   He bled out in my arms.  I swore then that I would never let anything like that happen again.”

Mack gazed at Fitz, pleading with him to understand.

“HYDRA managed to flourish the way they did because of how SHIELD was run.  Because of the secrets Fury kept.  One man can’t be the head of everything – it’s too much.  There needed to be transparency, democracy, so nothing like that can ever happen again.  That’s what the SHIELD I threw my hat in with represent.  It’s how I believe it _needs_ to be.  I like Coulson, I do.  But he kept secrets from everyone.  That alien writing?  Following those leads almost killed me.  I almost killed you.  Trip _was_ killed.  _Izzy_ was killed.  Some of those deaths could have been avoided if we had had more information.  I believe in my SHIELD.  They would have handled things differently.  I was just doing what I thought needed to be done.”

Fitz had remained quiet throughout Mack’s speech.  His arms were still crossed but it looked more like he was trying to keep himself together rather than an act of defiance now.  His voice wavered as he spoke.

“You could have _told me_.  You could have explained why you were here.  I might not have agreed with everything you said but I would have been willing to listen.  You mean..you meant..ugh..so damn much to me and then I find out you betrayed us.  Just like Ward betrayed us.  I can’t, Mack.  I can’t handle going through that again.”

Mack ached to pull Fitz towards him, to crush the smaller body against his and offer him comfort, reassurance.  He knew that Fitz wouldn’t allow it, not now.

“Turbo, please.  You know I would _never_ hurt you.  I’m not Ward.  I wanted to tell you.  _Every day,_ I wanted to tell you.  But I couldn’t put you in that position.  I couldn’t make you have to lie to everyone.  These people are your family, I know that.  I care about you too damn much to have made you choose.”

Fitz scoffs.  “You care about me?  Really?  Or was I just the easiest to get close to?  _Oh, I know – I’ll befriend the disabled guy that no one else speaks to, that’ll get me the dish on this team._ ”

Mack tries to interrupt but Fitz’s words storm over him as Fitz squares up to him, hands pushing against Mack’s chest as he continues.

“You made me think that you were my friend.  You helped me.  You made me think you wanted me.  You made me fall in lo- - “

Fitz trailed off, head falling to his chest as he tried to get his breathing under control. 

Mack breathed Fitz in.  He’s so close.  At the first sound of a sob Mack pulled him in to a crushing hug, ignoring the pain that flares up his body.

“I do.  Fitz, I do love you.  After Tim I didn’t think I could love anyone again.  And then you came along.  Jesus, baby, you are it for me.  When I saw that the wall was going to blow I thought for sure I was gonna lose you.  That can’t happen.  You’re _everything_ to me.”

They stayed like that for a moment, Mack sitting on the bed, Fitz in between his legs, clutching his back as he buried his face in Mack’s neck.  Eventually, Mack gently pulled him away, until he can look in Fitz in the eyes.

“Say the word and I’ll leave Gonzales.  This has made me realise that _you_ are the most important thing in my life.  I’ll do whatever you want.”

Fitz’s eyes are wide as he bites his lips.

“What if I want to leave?”

“You want to join with us?”

“No. I mean what if I want to leave SHIELD.  Both of them.  What if I want to leave it all?”

Mack looks at Fitz, really looks at him.  He smiles and kisses him gently on the side of the mouth, it’s a soft brush of the lips against skin, a promise of more to come.

“Then I say just let me get discharged and I’ll pack my bag. I’m with you, Turbo.  Always.”


End file.
